Music quote of the day: Monica

” I been through the storm, had dirt on my name
I’m still holding on, champion of the game.”

- Still Standing, Monica

They gotta try harder to keep us down.

Just one more day y’alls.

Have a great weekend!!!

 .

Skin Type | Combination Skin

Combination skin is one of 4 skin types. It is usually partly oily and partly dry, and as such can have the characteristics of both skin types.

Typically, combination skin has a shine on the forehead, the nose and the chin (the T-Zone). These areas tend to show more enlarged pores and can have the same characteristics as oily skin:

 

- Oily shine all over the face
- Thicker texture
- Frequent breakouts
- Possible comedones
- Acne prone

The cheeks and other areas of the face usually appear drier and can have the characteristics of dry skin:

- Lack of sebum
- No oily film present
- Tight/ taut sensation
- Lack of suppleness and tone
- Matte complexion
- Closed pores
- Rough texture
- Flakes of dehydration

Treatment

It is very important to balance the T-Zone area on combination skin types, as well as to gently cleanse and exfoliate the areas with drier skin. 

Products like cleansers, toners and those that control bacterial activity like acne-spot treatments, which contain ingredients like  benzoyl peroxide, sulphur and salicylic acid for example, can be used  in the prevention of acne, breakouts, blackheads and whiteheads in the T-Zone area. 

Products that contain harsh alcohols and aggressive cleansing agents should not be used on the face, for any skin type. These products strip the face of it’s natural protective layer, and disturbs it’s balance. Doing so only triggers an automatic response by the skin to produce more oil.

Exfoliation

Mechanical exfoliation, in the form of gentle facial scrubs are recommended for use 1-2 times per week on combination skin types, with particular attention being paid to areas of the skin that experience dryness or flakiness. 

Combination skin can also benefit from chemical exfoliation treatments, particularly in the oil prone areas like the T-Zone area. The use of products that contain a mix of alpha and beta hydroxyacids (AHAs and BHAs),  such as glycolic and salicylic acid respectively, work well for combination types. Glycolic acid will help combat any signs of premature aging, like the formation of fine lines and wrinkles on dry skin areas, and salicylic acid will of course help control any unwanted bacterial action present in areas that are prone to excess oiliness.

These products should not be used in the eye area.

Dehydration

Like dry or oily skin, combination skin can also be dehydrated. When skin lacks water, it compensates for this by producing more oil. You may find that on days where you are not on top of your water intake, your skin appears shiner, and oilier than usual. Even the parts that are usually flaky appear to have excess oil and you think that your skin type is suddenly oily.

A water-based, fluid moisturizer that would take care of the dryness and balance the oil on skin works best for this type of skin. Also, keep water intake up and incorporate more vegetables in your diet.

Aging

As we age, the skin’s production of sebum decreases, and skin gets less oily and more dry. In the case of combination skin, it is recommended that you incorporate the appropriate skin care products and treatments to help delay premature aging of the dryer skin areas. 

And of course, wear sun screen.

 

Related posts
Skin Type | Oily Skin
Skin Type| Dry Skin
Exfoliating vs. Peeling 
10 Top Skin-Care Faux Pas 
 

Q/A: Mistaken Identity (Pt. 2)

Mistaken identity in the bedroom y’alls. You’re busy getting it in with your partner and them BAM!!! You go and open your big mouth and done yelled out the wrong name.

…Awkward.

So what do you do? Address it or ignore it?

Should you choose to address it, when would be a good time? Right then in the middle of it all? The mood is broken anyways. Or do you wait ’till tomorrow, or however long it takes for your partner to bring up the issue. 

What if you weren’t the one to call the wrong name, what do you do? Wait for the name to pop up again?

What if you KNOW the person who owns the name? Do you address that person as well as your partner? Do you play it off like nothing has happened then hire Magnum P.I? Or maybe you become your own private investigator and go through your partner’s phone and look for the name and prank call? Or maybe employ the skills of your techie nephew to crack ‘em laptop passwords wide open for ‘ya.

Man, the case of incorrect name dropping is tricky. Obviously it’s not the most pleasant thing for someone to hear, but I can’t imagine that it’s a pleasant position for the name-caller to be in either.

So what’s up?

Well, it depends. Generally, ’It Happens’ right? 

It’s normal for people to mix names up. Your parents can name everyone in your family before they eventually get to your name, especially when they’re mad at you.

Incorrect name-hollering aside, there are other factors you should look at when deciding your next move.

The status of the relationship

If it’s your first hit-it that was probably going to be a quit-it anyways, don’t take it personally, cut your losses and move on, no long talking. There isn’t a ‘feelings hurt’ clause in one night stands.

If it’s someone that you’ve been dating for a while, and this is the first time it has happened, and everything otherwise is legit in the relationships, i.e. all routines are being kept – no working late nights, no hanging out with ‘buddies’ extra hard, and the buddy that s/he was supposed to be liming with didn’t just call the home phone for him/her… it is probably an honest mistake. If things in the relationship are shaky, google “Private Investigator” and look for one in your your state.

If you’re married and everything in the relationship is copacetic, again, consider it an honest mistake. Everyone deserves a strike one. If however, things have been shaky for months and you have had enough evidence to convince you that something else is going on, might I suggest googling “Divorce Lawer”.

Seriously though, honest mistake or not, for the sake of keeping things open and honest in a relationship, it is a good idea to at least address it.

The name-call hearer

Now, some things about someone’s past, which will remain in his/her past and will no way affect the future of the relationship whatsoever, really ought to be kept in the past. However since your partner volunteered the info, then by golly yes, it is something that should be discussed. No rug is thick or wide enough to keep anyone from not tripping over a mistaken identity incident.

Nothing heavy and dramatic. No threatening to sleep with his/her best friend. No blaming yourself for it happening, and no temper tantrums, we’re grown. Get yourself together and ask questions like:

- “Who is this person?” Is it an ex, a co-worker, a celebrity?
- Is there any history? 

You know, constructive questions.

Nothing like:

- “So why THAT name?”.

There is no response in the world that will satisfactorily meet your the criteria for successfully answering that question, so don’t frustrate yourself. If your partner could have avoided it, s/he would have.

You are holding the trump in the relationship at this point, and your partner knows that. If they have any respect for you whatsoever they’d already be walking on eggshells. Rest it, give the situation some time to breathe and give your partner the eagle eye from time to time to let them know that no, you’re not going to bring it up again, but yes… you remember. Be smart about it, besides anything and everything is yours at this point

The name-caller

As the name-caller, this is your opportunity to come clean, I mean, spill all them beans all over the newly polished floor, especially if the person, who’s name you called, is someone that you still interact with. If it’s a long lost, past fling who died, well sure, keep it brief. It’s your word vs. dead person’s; that’s might good odds for you.

The deed is already done, you’re already in the dog house.  The more comfortable you appear at volunteering the information asked, the less likely your partner is going to think that you are hiding something.

Why? Because if you aren’t hiding anything then why would you be uncomfortable?

As awkward as it may be for you to go into detail, trust that whether or not it you inadvertently shout that name again, if your partner ever comes to meet this:

“KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!! OOOOOH MYYYYY GOOOOOOODDDDD!!! YEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!”

and the story is anything more than you described, It’s ova y’alls. 

This is a global world we live in. The world is a lot smaller than we’d like to think.

 

Related GC posts

What would you do?: Mistaken Identity (Pt. 1)
Q/A: Have I been one nighted?
It’s not me, it’s you
Lets keep it together ladies. 
Relationships | Deal breakers 

 

 

Music quote of the day: U2

“Only love can leave such a mark, but only love… can heal such a scar”

- Magnificent, U2
 

The power of love is undeniable. Imagine what we can do when we love ourselves.

Happy Wednesday y’alls!

.

Hair | A lifestyle

Being the best you doesn’t necessarily come easily, as the best you isn’t exactly the one that rolls off the bed every morning.  

We’re grown; Things no longer fall into place as they used to. Looking your best you is your little secret, one that takes some time and effort to figure out what works (and what doesn’t) and then to stick to a maintenance routine. Part of this journey requires figuring out your signature hairstyle, that combination of cut, colour and texture that works best for you.

No-one’s saying that you need to be stuck in a hair rut, but like Halle’s pixie, some styles effortlessly work for an individual, and can easily become their best accessory.

Set up a consultation with a stylist to find the cut/colour combination that works.  Explore different variations, lengths/ textures/ colours, of the same style from time to time, to look timelessly chic. Cropped or long, blunt or layered, sheared or razored, straight or curly, braided or locked, processed or natural, the great thing about fashion these days is that everything is in.

Consider your lifestyle

If you are not interested in spending both your week’s earnings and your weekends at the salon, do find a style that works with your natural hair texture and your lifestyle.

For example, if you are not interested in blowing out and flat-ironing your hair every morning, do not carry a headshot of your fav celeb who is sporting pin straight hair, when your hair is chock full of luscious curls.  It will be you against the curl every time you roll off that bed in the morning. 

You’d be miserable and no fun to anyone. Humidity will not be your friend. Not being able to go to the gym because your hairstyle wouldn’t allow it, or not being able to wash your hair at least once a week is no longer acceptable grown behaviour.

Cuts that require intensive styling only look well when intensely styled. Rocking a chic do’ that works with your lifestyle and morning routine will always outshine hair in a fab cut that is pulled back in a ponytail everyday because your kids demand all your time on morning.

Find a ‘do that you can incorporate into your lifestyle.

 

Related posts
Wash mindfully
Clean roots, Soften ends
Hair | Beweaveable
Stragglers
Lets keep it together ladies. 

 

Relationships | Deal breakers

No-one is perfect, and neither will be your potential mate. There are some personal attributes that are worth overlooking and some that are far too great to ignore. 

Perhaps males do to a lesser extent than females do, but the average person has a laundry list of expectations of their potential mate. On this list can include personality traits, physical looks and possessions, just to name a few. If you look hard enough it is not impossible to find someone, who possesses everything that you desire on paper, but what about the other intangible qualities, or baggage that s/he may come with? Do these then matter?

If you are looking for the socially accepted ideology – a mate, house, kids, a dog, a couple goldfish… or even if you are the type who requires companionship to live a fulfilled life then maybe you ought to consider different combinations of scenarios, and decide which FEW things are of utmost importance to you.

Focus on those things that you:

a) Cannot live without, as well as those that you,

b) Cannot live with.

These things we shall refer to as relationship deal-breakers.

Of course, this is not to say that you need to be so desperate for a mate that you ignore clear and present red flags, but you know, Prioritize.

What if there is no passion in the relationship, but there is security?

Consider the following

What if the person:

- Is verbally or emotionally abusive but not physically
- Has bad credit
- Has a criminal record
- Is divorced
- Is married
- Has no intention of integrating themselves into your culture
- Already has a child or children
- Has a meddling baby momma/ daddy
- Has parents who don’t like you
- Has communication/ trust issues

Females, what if he makes less than you do?

Males what if she’s articulate and well qualified but stripped to pay tuition?

How much do these things matter to you?

These things listed above pale in comparison to some of the relationship challenges that are currently out there. With the state of economic affairs today, and with soaring divorce rates, sometimes we need to put down the fairy tale laundry list for a minute and look at the challenges that affect most people, including us, in relationships today.

It is too late to think about these things after we’re already in the relationship.

Prioritize your relationship needs.

Opposites may attract but it may not necessarily make a relationship work. Some relationship challenges can be worked through and some, well… ‘can’t’ is not positive word, so lets just say that some may not be worth the personal sacrifice, your personal sacrifice. Because lets face it, ain’t nobody else but you gonna be really making one.

Compromise doesn’t mean entirely giving up something, which you can’t live without, for an infinite amount of time, even if both people agree to give up something. That’s a recipe for disaster, as that’s not how we are programmed to work as humans.

Sometimes too much chemistry in a relationship can fuel it’s self destruction, or regularly blow simple things out of proportion. Sometimes no amount of money in the world can make up for someone’s lack of respect for themselves, their abusive behavior toward you, or their apparent disdain for your kids.

In addition to figuring out what your mate needs to physically bring to the table to satisfy our needs, we also ought to figure out the mix of the intangible things that we require in a relationship, in order that we are able  to maintain our happiness and sanity.

 

Related posts:
Deep Sea Fishing
It’s not me, it’s you  
Sexy State of Mind
What would you do?: Mistaken Identity (Pt. 1)

 

Music quote of the day: Chic

“Must put an end to this stress and strife
…We want the best, we won’t settle for less
These are the good times, our new state of mind…”

- Good Times, Chic

Set your goal and press on.
You owe it to yourself to try.

Happy Wednesday y’alls!

Exfoliating vs. Peeling

The words peeling and exfoliating are often used interchangeably, but there is a big difference between chemical exfoliation that is done in Medical Spas by estheticians, and chemical peeling that is done by dermatologists or plastic surgeons.

Both processes refine the skin’s appearance in a relatively short period of time. However, in chemical exfoliation, only superficial layers of the skin are removed whereas deeper layers of skin are removed in the chemical peeling process.

Chemical peels are acids that are applied on the skin, which facilitate a controlled shedding of the skin’s surface.

Types of Chemical Peels

There are three types of chemical peels:

- Superficial peels

- Medium depth peels

- Deep peels

Medium and deep peels are generally NOT recommended for medium to darker skin types. This is because medium to darker skins are prone to hyper-pigmentation (darkening) and scarring. During these deeper chemical peels, skin is essentially damaged to the point where it is forced to repair itself and form a new superficial layer. This process, in medium to darker skins, can result in permanent scarring.

Superficial peels

Generally, superficial chemical peels may be used on most skin types/ conditions, however different active ingredients are used depending on the type of treatment required. Some of the more common types of acids used in superficial peels include:

- Glycolic acid – used to refine aging skin and for brightening dark spots

- Lactic acid - used for sensitive skin

- Salicylic acid - used for acne prone skin.

Microdermabrasion is considered a superficial peel, as in this process only the outermost layers of skin are removed. However, unlike chemical peels where superficial layers of skin are removed chemically, in microdermabrasion the outermost layers of skin  are removed mechanically.

Superficial peels may be performed by estheticians who have been appropriately trained in this procedure.

Typically there is no downside associated with superficial peeling procedures, and recovery may consist of mild redness and flaking. Normal activities may be resumed with the use of appropriate sun protection. 

Medium depth peels

Medium depth peels are recommended for fair complexions, and usually contain higher levels of stronger acids. 

In this process, the outer, superficial layers of the skin are targeted as well as some of the deeper layers of the skin.

Recovery occurs within 5-7 days after which sloughing of the skin occurs. Skin is red immediately after treatment and is often accompanied by swelling. Skin turns brown in colour within a day of the treatment and begins the peeling process within 3 or 4 days.

Medium depth peels can only be administered by dermatologists or medical surgeons and are not recommended for medium to darker skin tones.

Deep peels

These peels produce the most result, but are the most damaging.

They are recommended for fair skin types and for treating:

- Wrinkles
- Scars and blemishes and
- Precancerous skin lesions (in some cases)

Deep peels go so far into the skin’s layers that anesthesia may be required during the procedure to reduce the warm, hot and stinging sensation. 

Recovery time is the longest with deep peels. Immediately after this peel, skin is red and can result in swelling and blistering. A crust may form and will turn a brown colour just before it peels off. As deep peels penetrate various layers of skin, the skin may shed various layers over a 1-2 week period, and appropriate skin dressings may be prescribed to keep skin moist.

The new skin that is developed will feel and resemble that which has been terribly sunburnt, but will gradually fade to normal skin colour.

Only dermatologists and medical surgeons are qualified to perform deep peel skin treatments. 

Deep chemical peels are not recommended for medium to darker skin tones.

 

Related posts
Fact Sheet: Microdermabrasion
Smooth Criminal | Exfoliation  
Tip| Skin Types

 

Dec 1| HIV: Reality

 

” Today more people than ever before are living with HIV and each year new infections occur.” 

- World AIDS Day Org.

The World AIDS Day organization explains that HIV is a virus that attacks the body’s immune system – the body’s defence against diseases.

HIV and AIDS are not the same.

When someone is described as living with HIV, they have the HIV virus in their body. A person is considered to have developed AIDS when the immune system is so weak it can no longer fight off a range of diseases with which it would normally cope.

For more on the basics of HIV and AIDS click here.

SOME INTERNATIONAL HIV/AIDS STATS :

People living with HIV:

* 33.4 million people living with HIV worldwide
* 31.3 million adults
* 15.7 million women
* 2.1 million children under 15

New HIV cases in 2008:

* 2.7 million people
* 2.3 million adults
* 430,000 children under 15

HIV-related deaths in 2008:

* 2 million total deaths

For more stats see here. 

Understanding the facts is key to fighting prejudice, and protecting yourself and others.

For more information oh HIV and AIDS, and the 2009 UK campaign, visit the Official World Aids Day site. 

Educated yourself and get tested.

 

Site Consulted
http://www.worldaidsday.org/

 

Music quote of the day | Maino

“How… could you stop me? 
Why in the world would you try? 
I go hard forever, that’s just how I’m designed…”

- All the above, Maino ft. T-Pain

You’re a soldier, a rider, and a surviver. Yup!

Happy Tuesday y’alls!