Dying for fashion
Tuesday, August 24th, 2010
I’ve just come out of hiding. You know this. But I keep seeing something that makes me want to run right back into my secret hiding place, until it all goes away. What the hell is up with ‘skinny’ jeans, ON MEN?
I mean, I am something near to disgusted when I see this ungodly trend. I don’t know what it is like outside the wonderful cocoon that I like to call Trinidad, but I went to a band launching this year and I was appalled and worried at the same time to see all these ‘skin-tight’ jeans on men. Especially the young men. Never have I ever been so happy to be my own age (especially when I’m considered a MILF – a degrading, but somehow flattering term I will touch on at some point.)
I see these young men strutting around, and the pants are so tight, TOO tight. My girlfriend had to point out to me that some of these little boys (cause no Grown man would would wear these fashion DON’TS on purpose; they’d be aware of the risks) are actually wearing women’s jeans, which just is just bordering on insane.
Some other trends that throw me for a loop are the:
- Grilles.
Gold/ silver/ diamond encrusted/ platinum teeth coverings - Excessively baggy pants.
that are so large that they would not ever fit even with a belt - Underwear that is purposefully on display.
- Tonnes of gold, silver and platinum jewelery around the neck
- Earrings that are ridiculously large and/ or way too heavy for any earlobe to handle .
Both the diamonds, real or fake, and the ones that stretch the earlobes to gargantuan proportions. - Full body tattoos with no meaning to the individual whatsoever other than, “I liked the design“
I can go on forever.
But the one that really worries me is the tight pants on fellas. I mean is this the end of the human race as we know it? Do they really know the consequences of these choices?
Even I know that there is a reason that the Almighty put the family jewels in a little sack AWAY from the body. It is because the normal body heat of the human being can hamper sperm production.
HMM…
I am actually a little happy about this since I have two younger brothers who have fallen prey to this fad:. It means that should they put Jesus out of their thoughts and do the nasty without protection, at least the little swimmers will be at a distinct disadvantage. For some men its reversible, but who wants to test that theory?
This trend is so worrisome to me that, as per usual, I just had to do a little more research to see what are the possible repercussions of squeezing and suffocating the man jewels. The list was shocking. Aside from the reduction in sperm production that I already knew, I read about hip displacement, strange bowel movements, nerve damage…
I mean we ladies wear the high heels, but that isn’t screwing around with our reproductive systems. This is serious people!
Then too, it doesn’t even look good. I am sorry but I don’t find it sexy to see tight-@ss jeans down to the ankles, drawers hanging out AND converse sneaks. YUCK! Beenie man is an entertainer , who needs the attention and so can wear that nonsense and get away with it. It’s like Lady Gaga – you don’t see me wearing period coloured lingerie.
So the choice is yours fellas. Die for fashion or Live with sense. If you plan on having kids, you will be thankful that you chose the latter.
Forward Ever
Guys, the words ‘fit’ and ‘tight’ are not interchangeable.There’s a huge style difference between slim, straight jeans and ‘skinny’ jeans. As man, if you are wearing a pair of jeans or trousers that are made with more than 2% Lycra, chances are they’re hugging a wee bit too much.
Give me a slim, straight cut, no-frills, dark wash jeans on a guy any day. Jeggins? (The love child of jeans and leggings) Well…wow. Just looks distractingly uncomfortable. And now they’re coloured. Saw a guy in what looked like a 97% Lycra/ 3% cotton blend, Cobalt blue one at a sporting match that I went to the other day. That’s just taking a good thing way too far.
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Maaaaaaaan!!! You have no idea how irritating and disturbign this is. I am seeing it waaaay too often in TT, along with other things that making me wonder if the youths dem loing all sense of manhood identity. What dem watching? What dem eating? MADNESS!
And no, it’s not my Jamaican-ness getting the better of me here. It just look stupid and unmanly! LAWGS!
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ooh ooh ooh! i wish i had a camera the other day. had the privilege to meet a young man wearing fluorscent blue and pink skinny jeans? dying fir fashion you say? somebody just catch it shoot it and put it out of its misery… disgraceful…
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