How to | Summerize a Simple Frock

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Fall may be fast approaching, sure, but summer is still here.  Starting with a simple dress, even a black one, here are 5 ways to bring some Summer into your life, and your remaining wardrobe, without busting the bank.

1. Add Stripes

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Nautical stripes (blue and white) is the most widely associated with spring and summer, but really any sort of stripes will do. A striped canvas bag/ tote, striped espadrilles, a striped headband – anything striped will work.

Prada’s multicoloured stripes were most popular this spring/ summer season, perhaps evidenced by the fact that it has been so widely duplicated from anyone from H&M to the chinee shop down the road, and everyone in between.

2. Add Shimmer

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Replace your customary blush with a bronzer, which you can layer under your blush when you re-introduce it in the Fall.

Mix a bit of loose golden/ bronze pigment/ shimmer powder/ loose shimmer eyeshadow – whatever you have, with a dab of your normal lotion and apply it to your skin – particularly your arms, legs and whatever else you will be baring. Blend well. Of course you can just buy shimmer lotion if you want to, but I try to find ways to use the ridiculous amount of coloured cosmetics that I own, don’t use and have a difficult time throwing away for whatever reason.

I find that moisturized skin that shimmers looks instantly healthier and toned. Seeing that I haven’t been to the gym all summer, that’s an optical illusion that I can work with.

3. Add Colour

Colour can come from anywhere really

- Makeup

Coloured lips, either lipgloss or lipstick – your preference, is the easiest way to add some colour to your makeup. Pink and coral tones are most widely used, largely because these tones are easiest to wear and most flattering on most skin types. Coral lip colour will carry you through fall, so feel free to still cop one that flatters your skin tone.

Adding a coloured eyeliner, like a teal, turquoise, forest green… can up the ante on your summer nights look, as would coloured mascara. But please, unless the  eyeliner and mascara are the exact colour, do either or.

- Shoes

Pumps, moccasins, sandals, wedges, Keds, Vans, whatever you choose to wear, add some colour or patterns to the mix.

Please, flip-flops are for the beach and belong nowhere near an office.

- Bag

Choose whatever style of bag matches your personality. A fanny pack if you are a no-fuss minimalist. A tote if you have a kazillion must haves. A knapsack. A messenger bag if you are more the ‘ready, set, gone’ type. Whatever bag your personality craves, get a coloured/ patterned one.

- Accessories

Add hair accessories like bandeaus, flower pins/ clips, stack statement tatement bangles/ necklaces OR add brightly coloured earrings. Choose one and work it.

One thing to make sure when earring shopping – most bold earrings tend to be heavy so make sure to check out the weight of them before purchasing. 5lb laptops are near passe, why would you want to carry a 10lb earring? Stretched earlobes, much like a back injury, cannot be reversed.

- Belts

Thick/ thin/ woven/ metallic/ leather/ pleather or otherwise, a coloured belt can take your wardrobe up a summer notch.

Tip: Let your physical size, both girth and height, be your guide to choosing the width of your belt. The more petite your are, the more flattering slimmer belts will look. Likewise, the taller and/or wider you are, the more flattering a wider, brighter, coloured belt will appear.

4. Add Sandals

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I’m a stiletto girl myself eh, but even against the fushia-est, peep-toe, stiletto pump, there’s really no mistaking the ability of  the simplest, nude-leather, thong, flat sandals, to make even the blah-est dress feel like summer. Perhaps it’s because, unlike the pump, there’s no thought of wearing thong sandals in any other season without risking a dread frostbite in ya tail.

If you must go tall, wedges are a lot more summer-y than stilettos. Throw in cork, or the woven espadrille typed soles and you’re even more in the mix. Also, peep-toe (rather than closed-toe) or sling-back, styled wedges, look more like you consciously opted to wear wedges, and less like needing to wear them for orthopedic reasons.

5. Smile

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It’s summer for crying out loud. Longer days, ripe for patio dinners and sangria with friends and family over a never-ending, ever-amorphous convo. Festivals. The beach. BBQs. Road trips. No  jackets.

*Spoiler Alert*: If you can’t find a reason to smile now, then your life would really suck in a few months.

Carry on.

b Freakin’Fabulous

Elevate Your Summer Style.

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Summer Staples: A wide-brimmed hat. Vintage shades. Sandals. A good book. Sangria.

Carry your Summer Style to another level with these few tips.

1. Lighten Up

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In every aspect of your life. Starting with your:

- Clothing
Starting with the colours and fabrics of your summer wardrobe. Cotton blends work best to beat the heat and still look fashionably crisp. The words ‘wool’, ‘ flannel’ and/ or ‘tweed’ have no place in a summer wardrobe.

- Makeup
Start with swapping your cream foundation for loose (or compact) powder, and coloured cosmetics in deep rich hues for fresh, golden ones. Or skip the powder altogether and just apply a bit of bronzer on cheeks and the bridge of your noze, a coat or two of mascara and some lip gloss. No long talkin’.

- Food
Swap ground provisions and hearty soups for lighter fare that doesn’t weigh you down, and keeps you hydrated while you check out the various scenes and festivals of the season with your chosen few.

- Drinks
Substitute the hard liquour for the season’s crisp wines. If you insist on beer, try the ‘lite’-r versions.

- Attitude
Quit taking yourself so seriously. Noone else does.

Half the year is gone. There is great opportunity for physical and emotional cleansing during Summer; Take advantage of it.

2. Accessorize

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Layer chunky necklaces, bangles, and rings. Don statement bags, hair, lightweight scarves/ pashminas (for when the temperature drops in the evenings). Step out of your tunnel and get creative.

And colour it up. Add colour wherever you can – busy patterns, loud and proud brights, neon nails, coloured capris (guys included), colourful kicks… just one at a time though.

3. Keep a clean scene

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Hygiene. It is imperative that this is kept at an all-time high.

Keep nails clean and at a decent length. Exfoliate heels regularly and moisturize with a thick cream at night. As gloriously, luxurious as reality TV shoes may make this appear, this process doesn’t have to be expensive. Invest in a nail file, a nail clipper, a foot file (or pumice stone if you prefer). In terms of moisturizing, you’d be surprised how effective cocoa/ shea/ coconut butter, applied to heels at night before bed, is against ashy feet/ cracked heels. Even olive oil from your pantry can work, so there is really no excuse.

Keep hair at bay, especially in the pits and nether regions. For women it’s best if the pit area is all clear. For men, well the jury is out on that, but at least control the “RARH” effect with a trim every so often. Line up the nether regions and keep it low, if not only because the heat and humidity of the summer climate increases the chance of [foul] odours.

Ladies, I think it’s generally accepted that all hair be removed from legs if you are going to put them on display. Different hair removal methods are discussed here.

In a crunch and didn’t have time to wax/ shave? Wear sheer, coloured, leggings under a short frock. The general public would be non the wiser, unless of course you are over 2 weeks overdue. In that case. opt for opaque ones.

4. Underwear

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Because of climate and temperature restrictions, there’s only so much $$ I’m willing on spend on summer gear that I can wear for, and within, a maximum of about 8 weeks from the purchase date.  As such, my Summer season wardrobe is probably the collection that consists of the most ‘disposable’ elements – You know, brand, spanking new items  that cost $21.50 or less, tax inclusive. The jersey dresses, maxi or otherwise, the light-weight knit bodycon  dresses, and the ever present racer back tees-and-lightweight knit pencil skirts combo are staples. Simple, easy to pack and carry, can be dressed up or down, and effortless to pair with anything at anytime. Can go from work to patio dinners to the club. Plus no ironing necessary; Everything in life should be this simple.

Perfect for the most part, only thing is that lightweight materials provide very little structure in terms of holding the body parts in. Invest in some decent shapewear with the money that you’ve saved on copping inexpensive summer gear. And most importantly of all use it, especially under that white, stretch, H&M, tube, Maxi dress… O_o

Oh, and brightly-coloured, thong underwear under white clothing naaaaaah mek it.

5. Swimsuits

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Surprise us. Do something different and try a fashion forward, one-piece why not.

Carry on.

b Freakin’Fabulous

Colour-Blocking 101

Image: Denim Magazine | Aug ’11

Tips on working on of my fav. Summer trends ever.

1. One trend at a time.

Either Colour-Block OR Animal Prints. Not both. The end is never good when two divas are placed in the same room. Opting for the color-block look is eye-catching enough; Having one trend compete with each other just screams trying too hard.

My two cents would be to choose colour for now and save your animal prints for Fall – it’s right around the corner.

2. Choose your colour battles.

Keep colour in the same family, (oranges with reds, pinks with purples, use the same colour in different shades) …  or not, if your personality would allow you to get away with it. Pair fuschia, orange and light-but-bright blue as Malinda Williams does on the cover of Denim Magazine here, but remember to ground your look elsewhere.

“Either boldly coloured clothing OR accessories OR shoes.”

The “Nicki Minaj” fashion statement only works on Nicki Minaj.

If you choose to wear boldy coloured clothing, keep accessories to a tasteful minimum, and ground the look with nude shoes/ sandals. to pair black shoes with such a multi-coloured, get-up would be a tragic, amateur mistake.

If you choose boldly coloured shoes, let that be the focal point of the look and go with a more neutral or mono-toned clothing choice. The same goes if you choose to wear bold accessories.

P.S. – Neon nail colour also counts as accessories on Grown folk.

Taking heed to this either, [either], or, will be the difference between looking skillfully put together, and looking a saucy mess. It’s a razor thin line, but the results are worlds apart.

3. The Fit-&-Flatter Concept

Bold clothing will attract some level of otherwise unintended attention, so this concept right here is key. With so much going on, colour-blocked items usually work best when worn in a body-conscious silhouette, meaning that the clothing fits very close to the body. Be sure to wear the right underwear/ shapewear if necessary. the tag may say “One size fits all” but all what? All models? All size 2-8s? Definitely not all human beings on this planet. That is physically impossible. What is it made out of? Ballon plastic? Even that has a breaking point. There is a reason why even condoms come in different sizes.

The hotter the trend, the less room there is for mistakes. Know your size and the tensile strength of the fabric that you are wearing. And oh, Spanks don’t catch everything eh, especially if the brand is “fanks”.

4. Tone down the makeup

Another secret to pulling off this bold trend is to keep makeup to a minimum. There is never an excuse to wear red lipstick with this trend. Please and No.  No neon-clothing-with-fuschia-lips-and-blue-eyeshadow combo.  At least not for normal daytime activities for you will look like a 0.99c special. Clown days are over. Less is more.

5. Confidence

As with all other statement trends, the real clincher is here genuine confidence. The kind that emanates from the depths of your soul. The kind that is reflected in the pep in your step, and not store-bought, or BS kind – that’s not substantial enough. It’s very important for you to be comfortable in whatever you are wearing. Pick your peonie and ROCK. IT. HARD.

Carry on.

b FiercelyFabulous

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5 Things NOT To Do To Your Skin this Summer.

5 of the worst things you can do to your skin during Summer.

1. Aggressive Facials

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By aggressive I mean any treatments that involve advanced exfoliation techniques, or includes terms such as chemical peels or microdermabrasion.

Also any facial procedures involving invasive techniques – cosmetic surgeries, nips, lifts, tucks – anything that pierces the face, should also be put off until the fall or winter, unless you would be recuperating in some retreat, indoors and far, far away from the hustle of life in the fast lane where the rest of us will be. If you would be at such a retreat, gwaan on along with your treatment and please do us all a favour and, like a good friend, not mention how ‘ super awesome’ it was.

Exposure to UV rays already increases skin’s sensitivity. No need to make this sensitivity worse by dousing your face in glycolic acid. This combination can result in your worse nightmare, including, but not limited to blisters, darkening of skin areas and disfigurement.

2. Skipping moisturizer

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Typically most skin types are more oily during the summer months. Those of us with naturally oily/ acne prone skin tend to forgo moisturizer altogether, thinking that this excess oil means that the skin moisturizes itself on it’s own. Increased oil production is usually a sign of dehydration, therefore it is important to replenish water levels in skin by increasing the amount of water you drink yes, but it’s said that only something like 10% of the water we drink actually make it to the skin. This is not something that you can quote me on, but considering that most of us barely pass the 2-glass mark daily for water, anything less than 115% absorption of this water we drink is cause for concern.

Therefore, applying a water-based, oil free moisturizer can help replenish the water levels in the skin. These types of moisturizers usually are labeled as such, may be referred to as a ‘gel’ or ‘fluid’ moisturizer and usually list ‘Water’ as the first ingredient.

Stay clear of anything that is labeled a ‘cream’, passes the ‘Dairy Queen’ test (you can turn the opened jar upside down and the contents not fall out), or contains mineral oil (or any such oil) in it’s ingredient listing.

3. Showering less

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“So many fun things to do, so little time!”

No papi. Not so fast.

It’s summer. It’s warm, and it’s humid. Bacteria are in love. They breed, and they multiply, which inevitably results in an odour. YOUR odour, aka B.O.

Hygiene in general needs to be thrown into high gear, and on autopilot. Automatic. Noone wants to out more fires than necessary at the BBQ lime.

Let’s remember the Summer watchwords – Shower & Shave.

4. Not exfoliating

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Closely related to #3, exfoliation of the body helps to remove excess oil buildup that may occur during the day. It helps skin to breathe, look instantly refreshed and ‘glow’, as manually exfoliating the body increases blood circulation.

You can cop one of those kazillion commercial body scrubs on the market and and get it on in the shower. However, I find most of them oily, and hardly worth their cost as most contain very little exfoliating ingredients.

Alternatives?

Dry brush your skin using a dry body brush before you shower, brushing in strokes that lead toward your heart (the direction in which your blood flows). I’ve read that dry brushing, among many other benefits such as shedding dead skin cells, rejuvenating the nervous system and assisting in lymphatic cleansing to name a few, also assists with decreasing the appearance of cellulite… could be as good a reason as any to try it I’d say. Hey, I’ve done more for the promise of far less.

I find dry brushing more effective than brushing your skin in the shower (wet brushing I presume, though this term makes me feel like I need handcuffs), as  the bristles of the brushes, shown to the left, get softer in the shower.

I prefer my massage-pressure firm though, so if you are more of a light-pressure person, perhaps an in-shower brush-exfoliation may work. I do this twice a day – morning and evening.

For good measure, once a week I also do a body scrub, using a combination of cornmeal, honey and, for some slip, a bit of whatever body wash I’m using at the time.  Sometimes I just use ground coffee beans and body wash. Whatever is convenient. For more on body exfoliation see Smooth Criminal.

5. Not using sunscreen

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To my melanin-challenged folks, we aren’t all skin-kissed, bronze goddesses, I get that. But that is no reason to opt to play Cancer Roulette. Besides, sun-burns aren’t sexy, no matter what reality TV says. If wanting a tan is your reason to ride the sun-wave buck nekked, get a sun-less tan. There are tons on the market. I’m familiar with the brand Fake Bake – it’s fairly easy to use, it’s sold where I work, doesn’t leave you looking like like you belong on the Jersey Shore cast, and so this particular brand comes to mind, but there are many other brands. Try that route.

For those of us who are doing backstrokes in the melanin pond, don’t believe the hype that “Black Don’t Crack”. Not only can it crack, it can get mad spotty and unslightly – dark spots, light spots, uneven skin tone – you name it. Skin damage is not known to discriminate.

Be responsible with your skin, and, for wrinkles sake, use sunscreen.

Party on!

b FiercelyFabulous

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Body Concious | Rocking Ruffles

S2011| Emilio Pucci

Ruffles, much like the graphic prints of the season, add detail to a garment, but more than that, they also add volume.

They are dramatic, and bring attention to the area. With this in mind you can use ruffles to your advantage, by incorporating them in areas that you may find, well, lacking.

The size of the ruffles that you don should coincide with how much drama you wish to attract to that specific area.

How to Make Ruffles Work for You

Generally speaking, the placement of the ruffles will depend on your body shape – Pear, Inverted Triangle, Apple, Hourglass or Athletic – As ruffles, along with other embellishment trends like as feathers for example, work at attracting attention to an area, which, as a result, then removes the focus from other areas that you’d prefer not to play up as much.

The basic rules that apply when working the ruffles, feathers or embellishment trends on the above body shapes are as follows:

1. PEAR

Shoulders, chest and waist proportionally smaller than hips and thighs.

S2011 | Valentino

Focus ruffles in your top half, and keep lower half simple.

Ruffles located along interesting necklines like boat, and cold shoulder styles, draw attention away from lower half.

2. INVERTED TRIANGLE

Proportionately larger top half. Wider shoulders, little or no hips, slim legs

S2011 | Giorgio Armani

Balance broad shoulders with ruffled volume on lower half. Create the illusion of a waist by adding a belt.

3. APPLE

Proportionately larger waistline. Smaller shoulders, chest and hips. Slim legs.

S2011 | Alberta Ferretti

Whereas adding a belt a tied waistband will draw attention and add weight to the midsection,  ruched fabric in the the midsection area works at both camouflaging and minimizing waist.

Intricate necklines, and asymmetrical hems will also help divert attention away from midsection

Horizontal ruffles placed off center gives the illusion of an elongated torso. Alternatively, ruffle detail may be placed along V-neckline and/ or along hemline (either at knee or floor grazing, not in-between).

4. HOURGLASS

Proportionately smaller waist, chest and hips are wider and somewhat balance each other.

S2011 | Prada

This body shape naturally has volume in the desired places. Add ruffles in areas that do not put the flow in imbalance, like at the hem of a knee length pencil skirt ala Prada.

5. ATHLETIC

No areas are particularly wider, or narrower than the rest. Negligible difference between chest, waist and hip measurements.

S2011 | Jill Sanders

A blank canvas – add ruffles wherever there is desire to add more volume

• Up top to enhance cleavage
• Around waist to make a statement or
• Around hips to add curves.

ADDITIONAL TIPS

1. A smart way to wear ruffles is to wear small ones horizontally on a sheath dress silhouette – considered to be  universally flattering. This way, like stripes, the ruffles elongate rather than widen.
2. Ruffles, like feathers or jeweled embellishments, are noisy beings.  So that you do not start answering yourself, at least not in public, keep accessories minimal and  makeup natural.

b Freakin’Fabulous

Dodging Fashion Roadkill | The Maxi Dress

S2011 | Micheal Kors

As long as there are women, there will always be the Maxi dress. Designers must find this fact annoying because, perhaps in an effort to relieve their boredom, they’ve decided to inject different textures and structures into this spring/ summer staple. The possible result? An epic miss, with some of the most unflattering combinations known to man… or in this case, woman.

The word “Maxi”, as it applies to a dress (or skirt), refers to either length (usually floor grazing) or fullness  (voluminous) – either way there is a whole lot of fabric. The goal of a Maxi dress is to create the illusion of easy sophistication, but this punchline can easily get muddled when designers run with such wild abandon in the park of imagination,  that they miss the mark  totally.

Most of trends for this Spring/ Summer 2011 (S2011) may be seen somewhere on a Maxi Dress near you. Beware of the pitfalls.

1. The See-Through-Maxi

S2011 Trend: Lace/ See-through Fabrics

S2011 | Giorgio Armani

The issue: Visible underwear, isn’t Sexy. [Visibly] going without underwear, tramp style, is worse.  No-one is interested in seeing your ‘titillating’ ‘assets’. This dress will flatter noone with an ounce of flesh. Much more than the sheer fabric will be… bouncing… in the wind.

S2011 | Givenchy

The solution: Go sheer without going bare. Printed sheer materials can offer less translucency that plain coloured ones. Also, well placed detailing can detract, or conceal, areas of perverted interest. Depending on the dress, you can wear a (modern) slip.

2. The Bright, Boxy, Structured, Maxi

S2011 Trend: Bold Colours/ Menswear/ Suits

S2011 | Jill Saunders

The issue: Your waist called. He misses you.

May be laid back,  but this look is definitely not sexy. All that’s missing here are the potatoes, which is ironic because that’s probably the last thing that’s available  on that menu.

Proportions. Proportions. Proportions. An hourglass shape, or the illusion of one, is the key to classic style. Also,tThe overly structured look of this dress defeats the purpose of a Maxi dress.

S2011 | Lanvin

The solution: The bold colour rocks. Keep the structure to an asymmetrical neckline and a belted waist.

3. The Retro Maxi

S2011 Trend: Retro/ 60s Ladylike/ Red carpet glam

S2011 | Vivienne Westwood

The issue: More like 60s/ Ladylike Prom, and looks like the dress equivalent to helmet head – Untouchable.

S2011 | Lanvin

The solution: Switch up the fabric. Interpret the retro ladylike, rather than raid your mother/ grandmother’s closet. Similar silhouette, different reaction.

4. The Graphic Maxi (I)

S2011 Trend: Floral Prints

S2011 | Jill Saunders

The issue: Large prints, like this floral overwhelms petite frames. The dress’s voluminous nature around the waist area also does not complement a woman’s figure.

S2011 | Marc Jacobs

The solution: Choose a floral print that is proportional to your size – larger frames are better able to carry larger prints. Add interest to a floor grazing floral number with a contrasting detail in a complementary colour at the waist. Peek-a-boo skin, unveiled through a v-neck, gives balance to a potentially, visually dizzying number.

5. The Graphic Maxi (II)

S211 Trend: Bold Colours/ Geometric Prints/ Asymmetrical hems

S2011 | Vivienne Westwood

The Issue: An effort is made to highlight the waist with a twist-tie, but the  over-sized vertical stripes + no structure + peculiar dress length + bold colours+ excess fabric = Please Stop. My head hurts.

S2011 | Marc Jacobs

The solution: One voice at a time. Keep silhouettes, to dresses in busy fabrics, simple. The ruching detail in the right places breaks the monotony, and gives a flattering look to even the no-no horizontal stripe rule.

6. The White Maxi

S2011 Trend: All White/ Minimal/ 60s Ladylike

S2011 | Chloé

The issue: The abundance of fabric on the top half, in white no less, coupled with a gathered waist would make for an excessively commodious, unflattering look on most humans.

S2011 | Chloé

S2011 | Chloé

The solution: A wrap dress, or one that mimics it, is universally flattering, even in white, as it breaks up the details, as well as highlights the natural waist.

Tip: A V-neck works better than a round neck for fuller and/ or curvier figures.

7. The Unfinished Maxi

S2011 Trend: Asymmetrical Hems / Metallic/ Sheer/ Unfinished Detailing

S2011 | Vivienne Westwood

The issue: The first issue is the trend itself – Unfinished garments. Unhemmed garments, unclipped trimmings. A frayed, fuzzy look with thread dangling everywhere. Why? I’ll file this in the juvenile section, right next to destructed jeans.

More than the hems, the statement is undone in this crinkly, scratchy, bed-head looking kit, the draping of which also makes for an unflattering profile. Besides, if you are going to tote all of this fabric, and still have a peep show, why not just don a fitted, loosely crocheted dress instead? Oh yeah, that’s also a don’t.

S2011 | Micheal Kors

The solution: Just because the fabric has a metallic finish, doesn’t mean it has to look like it will cut you. Switching up the fabric to a touchable knit, (one that is also less sheer), and tightening the silhouette a touch, gives the still-asymmetrical look an easy-going, figure-enhancing flow. Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.

8. The Body Concious Maxi

S2011 Trend: Body Concious/ White/ Lace/ Sheer Fabrics

S2011 | Emilio Pucci

The issue: The combination of the above trend may make for a body conscious, but not a body flattering combo. Perhaps this would be better worn as resort wear, in the form of a beach cover-up.

S2011 | Emilio Pucci

The solution: Emphasize your curves in one trend. Either in lace/ sheer fabrics OR a body hugging silhouette.

OTHER USEFUL TIPS

1. DO give unexpected skin via a high slit or an asymmetrical hemline to give overly voluminous , or excessively lengthy dresses a modern edge, as Emilio Pucci does here.

S2011 | Emilio Pucci

S2011 | Emilio Pucci

2. DO play with the Military trend with ‘sober’ colour choices – e.g. olive green, navy, combined with subtle masculine detailing.

S2011 | Lanvin

Whoever said that Power can only be unleashed in a pant suit must have never experienced the Power of a Maxi.

b Freakin’Fabulous

The Science of Valentine’s Day Gift Giving

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For some of us, the only thing more challenging than making it through Saint Valentine’s Day (V-Day), is getting the gift correct. Let’s face it, when it comes to V-day gifts, there are the “OOOOOOOOOH!!!!“s, the “Oh….“s, and the “OH.“s.

Yes, V-Day is commercialized (what isn’t), and perhaps a bit overrated. We can go on forever and ever about that, but, if, at the end of all your boo-hoos and wha-whas, you are still going to give your special someone something, it has to make the grade.

A lot of pressure? Absolutely.
Especially if you only remember to get a gift the night before, and the only thing that is open is the pharmacy.

There is a science to V-day gift giving. Saint Valentines Day is a very unique day of the year. Though, like a Birth day or Christmas Day, it occurs every year, it carries a different sentiment. altogether There are no norms or customs. There is no onslaught of gifts from family and familiar faces. There is no expectation from anyone, but one, and that one, is YOU. Therefore, it is important that your gift does not flop.

That sad, solitary rose broadcasts that you forgot, and so do gift cards. You are better off getting a blank card, and filling it with all of the things that you don’t find yourself saying on a daily basis.

Gift cards are impersonal, and scream that you either didn’t have time to get a real present, or that you don’t know the person well enough to figure it out. There is a reason why the gift card business makes money – It is only useful if you remember that you have it. I have a Sephora gift card floating around for the last 4 years, and I’m a Beauty-product Junkie. Let’s work that math out.

A friend recalls her best V-day gift.

“… the biggest, fluffiest, white and red teddy bear, a bunch of 24 long stemmed red roses, and the most beautiful pair of gold earrings….‎​was sent to me at work…delivered by 3 [uniformed] guys, all dressed alike…”

I cannot begin to count the fantasies in there. The 3 uniformed guys, showing up at the right time, could have been a present enough. “Heeeyyyyy!”

To date, the best V-day gift I’ve ever received was a heart-shaped, diamond ring, ambushed by long-stemmed roses. It was the best gift not because it was the most expensive thing that I’ve ever received, it was the best gift because I didn’t expect it. I was in high-school,  he was as hot as Hell itself, and it was the first possession that I can recall actively hiding from my parents. Now that I have had some experience with men, I should have probably kept him around.

All that to say, the key to V-day gift giving, is that the gift need not be expensive, nor dramatic, It just needs to be memorable.

So what’s hot for 2011?

TECHNOLOGY

Technology is the new bling. The best thing about this gift idea is that it works whether your partner/ significant other/ FWB, is male or female.

If you are running low in the cha-ching department, Apps are good idea. There are millions to choose from.

Another cool yet manageable tech idea getting upgraded phones. And why not? You don’t have to measure for size, wonder if s/he will like the scent or colour as you would if you were buying cologne, a tie, jewelry or of course, the guy’s fav… socks.

Already both have smart phones? Get an unlimited data plan so that you can sexy bbm whole day, or perhaps ones with video talk options *blink*. What you do with those options is your call.

Reading is Sexy. It is especially if you are reading from a Nook, Kindle, or, Helleeeer, an Ipad. An eReader is a good option if you have a little extra cash to spare.

CLASSIC MENTIONABLES

These take a little more thought, and may require more planning time. However, there is more mileage on the impression left.

A wellness service for two.

Gift cards for wellness services seem to be very on trend. Yes, we do all need to de-stress, but very few of us like to leave our house to de-stress alone. Whether your significant other takes you, or a bff, a couples massage, for example, will go a lot longer than one meant for… well, one.

Magazine subscriptions.

For a magazine that s/he actually reads, of course. Inexpensive but appreciated, s/he will be reminded of you for at least a year.

Entertainment for two

Tickets to a show that s/he likes, or to a sports game for a team that s/he is a fan of. Or what about ones to that jerk Trey Songz’ concert, because she’s been dying to see him for like… forever. So what if you think he’s gay?

You may not be a fan of the activity, but suck it up, get them, and go anyway.

You really shouldn’t do something because of the kick-back, but you never know how that favour may be repaid.

I’m just sayin’.

The Romance Option

For a real mojo igniter, how about a romantic overnight stay at a hotel, with a dinner for two, and a breakfast in bed option for the next morning? Or perhaps a weekend getaway to a city of your choice. Feel free to insert a Spa in-room couples massage here as well. You’d get at least a couple free passes out of the dog house for this one right here, let me tell you. Oh, unless you are aiming for company in 9 months, be sure to walk with your family planning kit.

Jewelry, with a customized twist

Up the jewelry ante by getting something with a special date or name inscribed in it. *Dark Vader’s Pookie Bear* on the back of that beautiful Micheal Kors Baguette-Bezel, Rose Gold, Watch. No judgments, just suggestions. Do you.

His & Her Clothing

His and her leather jackets. Fab.

Switch it up guys.

Take a walk on the wild side and visit your local Victoria’s Secret, or similar store, with your significant other. Again, go with her. Please, do not play hero and try to figure out the fit based on your sizing up of the sales person’s figure/ size. Yes, it’s a great thought, but doing so may very well result in a great thought that flopped, epically, in its execution.

The possibilities of this novel idea flopping are endless.

1. Since she has to wear it, it would help her mood if she likes what she is wearing, and of course if it fits well. There are very few things as uncomfortable as ill-fitting, non-stretch lace. I’d wear shoes that are too small for a day and a half, over doing that.

2. The last thing you would want to purchase for a woman is any clothing that is either overly big or overly small. This can result in an awkward silence, questions, or worse, just one question, the answer(s) to which you will never, ever be qualified enough to answer.

“You really see me as THIS BIG???”

or the thought…

***Wow… I guess I’m bigger than he thinks…***

They both suggest an issue with weight, which is, of course, not the response that are looking for. You shall be sleeping with yourself that night… on the couch. Not fun.

3. Regardless of what porn tells us, not all women feel sexy in lingerie. For these types of women, lingerie is then more of a present for you than for her, so maybe you can save this gift idea for your birthday. VS sells a myriad of things. Going with her enables her to get something that she actually wants – pampering beauty essentials, or even swimwear. Yes, I it may be still winter outside. A jump start on fashion on someone else’s dime? Always Fab.

b Freakin’Fabulous

Foot Fetish | 10 Steps to a Spa Pedicure

The Beyotch of all Pedicures.

The Spa Pedicure is one of the ultimate luxuries to pamper your digits. At a reputable nail salon, i.e one that takes the necessary precautions against the spread of diseases/ infections in a nail salon, this indulgence can run anywhere upwards of $75 a service, with a Spa Mani/ Pedi combo running at least an easy minimum $100.

In a bid to differentiate themselves from a fellow competitor, it is not uncommon for nail salons to present creative names for these services.

“The Ultimate Pedicure”

“The Signature Pedicure”

“Hot Lava Pedicure”

As a nail salon owner, the point here is to differentiate yourself. Get creative.

These types of pedicures are primarily found in middle to high end salons because of the sheer time it takes to get all of the goodies done - anywhere between 50 – 120 minutes. Usually, the longer the time taken, the more expensive the service.

So what is a Spa Pedicure anyways?

Typically, what differentiates a Spa pedicure from a Classic pedicure is pampering time. Therefore, Spa pedicures will probably include a scrub, a (perhaps extended) foot massage, as well as extra care to smoothing hardened soles of the feet. Uber high-end salons may also include a foot mask, paraffin treatments etc. These are inexpensive add-ons for the Spa, so the charge  largely comes for the use of the  therapist’s time. Additionally, there is also an additional cost for callus removal in a pedicure . Why? because any of these above processes can add up to 15 minutes each.

It is important to remember that Spa services , as opposed to other beauty services like Hair  services for example, are charged per minute rather than per service. Arrive late for your Spa service and you have only the remaining time in your reserved slot to get your service done, if they will grant you the the service at all, never mind, *swipe*, your credit card will be charged either way.

Why?

If the colouring service on your new hair colour/ cut/ style ‘do takes longer than anticipated, the stylist cannot exactly leave you mid service and tell you hard luck can s/he? Not so much. This is why there is normally a cancellation policy (usually 24-48 hours) for spa services. Time is money baby!

Can you achieve a similar service at home?

With the knowledge,  an hour, some patience, and the right tools, you sure can!

Here are 10 steps to an at-home Spa Pedicure, complete with tips to getting it right, polish optional.

Remember, practice makes you better.

YOU WILL NEED:

- Pedicure bowl with lukewarm water (warmer if you can tolerate it)
- Small to medium sized bowl with clean, lukewarm water (warmer if you can tolerate it)
- Orange stick and/ or nail pusher
- Nail Clipper,  made especially for clipping toes
- Nail File (180 grit)
- Foot soak/ Pedicure soak/ Mineral Salts/ Epson salts etc. (your choice)
- Hydrating Foot lotion
- Cuticle Oil
- Nail Buffer (white)
- Foot File
– 2 Hand Towels
- Nail polish remover and cotton balls (if necessary)

OPTIONAL ITEMS
- Cuticle nipper
- Foot Mask
- Callus softener
- Intensive Heel balm
- Base Coat, Top Coat, Nail polish

Time Required: 60 – 120 mins

1. Soak Feet

In pedicure bowl, mix foot soak in a generous amount of lukewarm water as per foot soak instructions. Place feet in bowl for up to 10 minutes.

2. Remove any existing polish from nails on both feet. (If necessary.)

3. Cut and File Nails

- Remove right foot from pedicure bath. Cut nails using nail clipper.
Note: cutting nails too short can damage the nail. Avoid cutting nails with too sharp of a  downward curve at the edge / sides of the nail, where the nail meets the side of your finger, as this may result in ingrown/ hangnails. Ouch.

- Using a nail file, file nails so that there are no sharp edges left by nail clipper, so that nail edge is smooth.

4. Clean the edges of the nail plate

- Using orange stick or nail pusher, GENTLY clean bottom of the nail bed, where it connects to the finger.

- GENTLY push back the cuticle using orange stick/ nail pusher.
Dead skin cells of the cuticle collect here, as well as residue from hand lotion, environmental dirt, etc. It is important not to scrape the nail bed in this area too roughly, as grave, possibly permanent, damage may be done to the nail bed.

- OPTIONAL – Cuticles may be clipped at this stage, but it is important to clip ONLY the dead, and not the living, tissue. If you are unsure of what is dead and what is living tissue, skip this stage altogether, as clipping live tissue can result in cuts, bleeding and damage to the cuticle.

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5. Buff nails and clean under free edge

- Using a white nail buffer, GENTLY buff nails (no more than 10 strokes per nail).
Buffing to smooth the nail bed. Overzealous buffing however, will result in thinning and possible damage to the nail plate, which is a common occurrence in professional manicures.  The amount of buffing that ought to be done will depend on the condition of the nail. It is important to  note that, depending on the depth of the ridges of the nail, it may not be possible to smoothen out all ridges, without removing the entire nail bed.

- Using orange stick, clean under free edge (the area at the top of the nail where gook collects when you use your nails to scratch… something) of any residual nail that may have collected here during the filing/ buffing stage.

6. Apply cuticle oil to cuticles

- Critical step to well manicured nails.

7. Apply callus softener and wrap foot

- Optional, if applicable, apply callus softener to any calluses/ hardened areas on soles of feet, and wrap foot in a towel.

Repeat steps 3 – 7 on left foot.

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8. Smooth calluses

- Starting with right foot, remove towel and smooth calluses/ hardened areas on soles of feet  with a back and forth motion using foot file. Repeat on left foot. And please, never use a razor blade.

9. Apply and remove scrub

- Starting with right foot, apply foot scrub for 2-3 minutes. Rinse with clean water from small bowl into the pedicure bowl. Repeat on left foot.

OPTIONAL – Apply foot mask
To right foot, avoiding the tips of the toes, and wrap in a towel. Repeat on left foot and let both feet stand for 5-10 minutes.

Rinse mask from right foot using clean water from bowl. Repeat on left foot.

10. Massage feet

- Massage hydrating foot lotion to right foot, including legs. Pay special attention to heels. Repeat on left foot.

- If necessary, apply heel balm to cracked heels, on right and left foot.

- Apply cuticle oil to cuticles.
*TIP – Cuticle oil is quite possibly any nail technician’s secret weapon as the application will make nails in any condition, look healthier. Guaranteed.

POLISH APPLICATION PREP (OPTIONAL)

For nail polish application, remove any traces of lotion from nails using a cotton ball with nail polish remover. Apply polish in the following order:

- Start with one coat for base coat to all nails.
- Follow with a coat, or two, of nail polish (one coat a time).
- End  with  Top coat application.

Finish with application of cuticle oil to cuticles, as in step above.

It’s easy to have a foot fetish with kissable feet!

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Not quite at this level? You can still have kissable feel with an at-home Classic pedicure. **Coming soon.**

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b Freakin’Fabulous

For more info. on how to protect yourself against infectious diseases in nail salons, click here.

Photo: Simon Howden / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Dodging the Office Party Pitfalls

The Christmas Party. Or, if you work for one of those politically correct companies, the “Holiday” Party.

Obviously, you ought to go. This goes without saying.

Sure, you may be antisocial, you may despise your co-workers or you may rather count sheep than live though a convo with Frank from accounting, but it will do your career more harm than good if you just skip the shindig altogether. Why? Because not showing up for an office related event – be it a party, family day or someone’s horrid excuse for a ‘team building’ exercise – gives the impression that you aren’t interested in the company or your future there.

Now regarding any work related events, there are two things to always keep in mind:

1. No matter how far away from the office the venue is, remember that it’s still a work function.
2. Regardless how convincing the higher-ups seem to be about oh how it’s a time for everyone to kick off their shoes and let down their hair and just have a great time…. They’re lying.

The following are my top 8 things to avoid doing at your office party

8. One-upping your boss

You may be stronger/ faster/ better but keep that info to yourself.

This is not the time to speak about your stint in Milan as a model after being scouted in your first year in university when your boss responds to one of your co-worker’s brown-nosing comments about him looking dapper. Neither is this the time to share the fact that you and your fiance are heading to the Megeve Ski Resort in response to the fact that your boss’s “lean Christmas” is resulting in him opting for a staycation with his cat. And it’s definitely not the time to bring up the fact that you were the brains behind the newly implemented program that is has saved the company Xmillie amount of moolah this year.

Some other don’ts in this category:

• Don’t harp about how wonderful or wonderfully annoying your significant other is is – no-one, not limited to you boss, cares.
• Don’t start a chugging or eating contest… or any contest for that matter.
• Don’t brown-nose and/ or talk too much shop

If you are in line for a promotion, be sure to perhaps get your boss away from the melee for a minute and speak briefly on some of the ideas you have to implement strategies relating to a major upcoming project. Of course this should be done fairly early and pre-scotch, i.e. before the convo ends up going south a-la #5 below.

• And at all costs, don’t do…

7. The Elaine dance

A definite fail.

If you don’t know what this is, chances are you’ve already done it. Because it’s impossible to describe, here’s a video clip:

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2cz0i

Under this we can include throwing down to any song that is decidedly inappropriate for the occasion. For example, displaying your best moves to Akon and Eminem’s “Smack That” and proclaming

“Man, this is my jaaaayyym!”

That may quite possibly be the last Holiday party the company will see both you and the DJ.

6. Hook up with a co-worker in the bathroom

Especially if you didn’t the the object of your urinal fling was all that and a bag of chips the day before, and/ or the person is more into you than you are into them. There will never be a good end to this scenario.

5. Have an ‘off-the-record’ convo with your boss after having had 2 shots of Patron

Though you may not remember the convo, chances are s/he will, and there will most definitely be an “on-the-record”  convo about it the morning after.

Under this we will include ‘smackin’ your boss’ @ss to aforementioned song, or smacking anyone for that matter lest a sexual harassment case slaps yours.

4. Bring your 2-minute old significant other to the party.

Though it may seem like a good idea at the time, this here can auger like a ticking time-bomb. You have no idea what to expect in the moment and chances are you’d either have to babysit the entire night, or have to deal with managing the after effects of him/ her displaying any of the above.

Although there are varying views regarding this, I’d go out on a limb here and say that unless you’re any combination of an executive/ married/ in line for a promotion and/ or/ therefore wish to avoid any compromising positions with that being from marketing who’s been getting a touch to friendly recently, keep business and personal private and leave your spouse out of it.

For those of us who flirt and/ or have lunch time DOOs with (a) co-worker(s), do your colleagues a favour and leave your ‘significant other’/ spouse home will ‘ya? Office parties are awkward enough, no need to bring the drama that will undoubtedly ensue.

3. Being the last one to leave.

Sure, you don’t get out often because of your work/ home responsibilities. And of course you wish to make the most of the $40 you paid the baby sitter to keep the kids overnight, but under no circumstance should you party the night away at your office shindig.

Show up on time [fashionably late never applies to work-related events] nurse a drink in one hand and make it across the room taking pit-stops at key points to ensure that your presence is noted. Then, just when the ties and the jackets start coming off, exit stage left and meet up with your real friends.

2. Calling in sick the day after because of your hangover

This is one of the biggest corporate no-nos. NEVER call in sick the day after:

• A company hosted event,
• A public holiday, or
• Your vacay.

I suppose the only thing worse would be being awakened by a tap on your shoulder by your boss… in your office, with your party hat on.

Find out what your company policy is on being hungover, being late – or not showing up at all – the day after the Holiday party. For most companies, it’s business as usual, no excuses.

1. Which all lead to the greatest office Holiday party DON’T ever:

Don’t get drunk.

Please enjoy responsibly.

Freakin’Fabulous

Related post: Office Party Ettiquette

If you do one thing for the Holidays…

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There are two types of people in this world. Those who fuss about the holidays, and those who don’t.

You know, the ones who stress themselves out about what everyone else will think, only to stress and bicker some more that the people who they were fretting for didn’t give a rat’s behind. Then there are those who live on the flip-side of this planet – the ones who don’t so much as buy a card for nobody, including moms.

If you do one thing to prepare for the holiday season, DETOX. Physically and mentally.

The festive season is usually a time of great excess, so prepare yourself for it in order that you don’t overindulge, over do, and over be, only to then be pressured into setting unrealistic goals for yourself. Goals of which you do not express loudly of course, because, nowadays, telling people that you’ve set ‘New Years resolutions’ for yourself is soooooo last decade. *Goooooosh*.

It’s all about the winging it, innit? Forget the goal setting, just freestyle the next 365 days of your life. Brilliant!

I digress.

The Holiday Season.

Excessive food.
Excessive conversation.
Excessive drinking.
Excessive spending.
Excessive skin teet.

Prepare your body and mind for it. Eliminate the the current build up of toxins, before you open up and indulge in new ones, so that come 01022011, you don’t feel chock full of bile and regret. Allow yourself enough psychological and physicial space to properly deal with excesses drama that don’t belong to you; the stuff that messes with your zen and makes your year start off with a *Pfffft* rather than a *How you like DEM apples!” kinda thing.

And while you are detoxing yourself, why not clean up your environment?

Schedule a Fall cleaning.

Declutter your space and make room for everything that you will and hope to receive in the new year.

SORT OUT YOUR *ISH.

Give the lightly used, clothing or otherwise, to charity, to someone you know, or to a family in need. For some of us, the unused stuff that you got on clearance because it was a ‘deal’, and paid no mind to the fact that it neither fits, nor compliments your shape nor anything else in your closet for that matter, also qualifies. Let’s face it, if you haven’t used it in a year, worse if you live in a climate that does NOT change for the entire year, then chances are you aren’t using it for a reason.

“Fabulous” fits and flatters. “Unfabulous” doesn’t.

Do yourself and the public at large a favour and give unfab away. Freely.

And while we’re getting busy with it…volunteer.

So you can’t buy something for everyone that you know is in need, but you can give of your time, your energy or perhaps of your experience. It is said the the less time that you spend focusing on yourself, the more you appreciate what and those that you have, especially when you spent your time with people who are less fortunate than you are.

Theory of relativity.

That’s like me stressing out yesterday about having lost my son’s bag, and his entire ‘LIFE’ along with it on the subway.

Stressful? Sure. I guess someone got an early Christmas. But when I think about the fact that I could have lost him???… well, losing a fun-filled knapsack ain’t so bad in the grand scheme of things. Go ahead and enjoy.

b Freakin’Fabulous.

Photo credits: dan / FreeDigitalPhotos.net